The Game of WAR
by Violist
Summary: Feliks goes to his best friend Toris's house and demands to play cards.


_Sorry that I haven't written/uploaded anything in ages. I'm just not as much into writing as I once was. ^^; This is actually based on a true story or me playing cards with my sister... **Slight LietPol and mentions of Switzerland/Liechtenstien.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.**_

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"Hey, hey. I wanna play cards!" Feliks announced one day, barging through the door at his best friend, Toris's house, "Let's, like, totally play cards."

"Um, okay..." Toris replied, "What do you want to play?" He then walked over to one of the kitchen drawers, and opened it to get a deck of cards.

"Let's play War. That's, like, the funnest card game ever, Liet!" Feliks chirped excitedly.

"Sure." Toris replied, and started shuffling the cards, then dealing the deck between the two. "You remember how to play, right?"

"Of course I do." Feliks rolled his eyes, then announced, "I'll go first!"

"We turn over the cards at the same time." Liet sighed. _'I knew that he couldn't remember how to play.' _he thought.

"Ohhh...Right." Feliks said, looking down, but then he perked up as they began to play.

The game ran smoothly after that, that is, until Feliks had put down a two of hearts, and Toris had a queen of spades.

"No, you can't take my two, Liet. You can, like, have all the rest, just not my two. It's, like, the bestest card ever, and it's mine!" Feliks shouted.

"But Feliks...Queen beats two, so I have to. It's the rules..." Toris tried to explain.

"Fine, but, like, no more taking my twos. Got it, Liet?" Feliks shook his pointer finger at his friend.

"Alright." Toris said then put his card down for the next round. This was going to be a long game...

"What are you doing?" Toris asked as he saw his friend, after winning a 'war' in the game, placing two of the cards-twos, of course- in a separate pile from the rest of his discarded cards.

"I'm, like, making sure you don't take my twos. It's totally going to work." Feliks explained, after making his piles all neat.

"You-nevermind. Just do it your way." Toris sighed, after almost trying to let Feliks know that he was breaking the rules. It's not like he would listen anyway...

So Feliks's act of collecting the twos went on until he had acquired them all, at which time he promptly shouted that he had done such. The game really became a mess when Feliks decided that it'd be more fun to throw the cards instead of placing them face-up on the table like a normal person.

"Feliks...Please stop doing that." Toris said, after getting hit by a card or two.

"Why? It's totally more fun doing it this way." Feliks threw another card for that turn, and it missed the table and hit the ground. "Pick it up."

"What?" Toris asked, staring blankly.

"Pick up the card. It's, like, by you, but on the floor." Feliks rolled his eyes.

"If you'd stop throwing the cards, they wouldn't land on the floor." Toris said, leaning over to pick up the card.

Feliks continued on his card-throwing rampage, also known as the game of 'War.' Cards were flying everywhere, and Toris was picking them all up on his friend's orders. One flew closer to Feliks, though, and Toris decided he wasn't going to take it.

"Pick it up." Toris stated.

"Why? You're, like, the card picker-upper." his friend said, a bit surprised.

"It's closer to you, and you threw it, so pick it up."

"No, you get it."

"Feliks."

"What?"

"Pick up the card."

"Never!" Feliks shouted, then picked two forks up off the table that Toris had set out for dinner. One was shorter than the other, but it did not matter to Feliks. He pointed them at Toris, "You pick it up!"

Toris grabbed the other two. Again, one was shorter than the other. "No!"

Then the two started dueling with the forks, not actually hurting each other, but certainly threating each other. That continued until Feliks noticed something. "Hey look, it looks like that guy, Vash, who, like, likes shooting at people and his totally cute sister!" He then proceeded to make suggestive movements between the forks.

Toris did a complete facepalm. "What are you doing now?"

"See, they're, like, making out and stuff." Feliks explained, continuing to play with the forks.

"...Huh?" Toris asked, completely bewildered by his friend's awkwardness.

"Do I need to, like, explain in detail, Liet? That's, like, their heads," he pointed to the pointed end of the fork, "and they're, like, kissing, see?" Feliks motioned once more, and made kissing sounds.

Toris then leaned over and picked up that long-forgotten card, and told Feliks to continue the game, and such they did.

"Hey Feliks, isn't that your pile of twos?" Toris asked when he noticed his friend place a nine over his sacred pile of twos.

"Oh my god! You're, like, totally right!" Feliks exclaimed, "My twos are now contaminated!" He quickly removed the nine and placed it in its rightful spot, Feliks's every-card-except-twos discard pile.

The rest of the game went along uneventfully. Well, aside from the throwing of cards, and Feliks's twos becoming 'contaminated' every once in a while. Then when they reached the very end, Toris said that Feliks had lost, but then Feliks reminded Toris that he had his stash of twos, but we all know how that ended.

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_Extra Author Note: After uploading this, I realised that I had forgotten to save some changes that I made to the file, so I'm sorry about that mistake. This is the correct one, and I hope to not ever do that again. ^^;_


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